My best friend as a kid was named Dan. Dan and I met in 4th grade, after my best friend at the time had moved. We were united by a fervor for both pokemon and yugioh at the time. When we hung out, we would play video games, watch movies, and generally keep it lowkey; however, we never really went outside much. As we started getting older, around 7th and 8th grade, we still never really hung out at the mall, hung out with girls, or any of that, preferring to isolate ourselves through video games and TV. We remained best friends up until High School, when I went away to a private school while he stayed at public school. We intended to remain friends in High School, but after going to a Metallica concert together as freshman, we started to drift apart. I hadn't seen Dan since I was a Freshman, and I didn't have any plans last night, so I decided to message him and see if he wanted to hang out. We made plans to meet at his house around 5:30.
Dan's a short kid, and he's a little chubby. He stands about 5'5, but weighs around 180 lbs. He also talks a little weird, but has always been a genuinely nice kid. When he met me at the door, I noticed he'd grown a beard. We chatted for a minute before I came inside his house, where I was met by his mom, also a genuinely nice person. After an initial reminisce, Dan and I headed to his basement, where we had spent much of our childhoods. The basement was about the same as I remembered it, except his old TV had been replaced with a nice flatscreen, and his sister had collected a miniature home studio, complete with amps, guitars, and microphones. Dan was very talkative at first, but after about 30 minutes conversation became more strained, because we realized we didn't have much in common. We spent the night watching Ted, and watching a few episodes of Family Guy and American Dad.
Dan never really outgrew video games, pokemon, and all of that. He talked about video games, anime, and TV almost as if he used it as an escape from reality. I was surprised to learn that he wrestled in High School at the 152 lb weight class, but in the short few months since he graduated High School, he's managed to gain 30 lbs, and not of muscle. I touched on the idea of girls with him, but the conversation was short. He told me he hasn't had much luck with girls, but not for a lack of trying. He added near the end of the conversation that he thinks that his beard is the reason he can't get a girlfriend, like all of his friends have. In terms of any extracurricular activity, it seems as if he doesn't have much. His average day seems to consist of school followed by video games; he didn't have many interests outside of those two things.
There's nothing wrong with Dan. Once you get past how he presents himself, he's just like any other person. The issue with Dan is that he hasn't experienced as much of life as he should've, through no fault of his own. He was never a popular kid, an many experiences of life had been denied to him through peer exclusion. He decided to fill his time with something to escape from reality, namely video games and TV. I was the same way in Middle School, but as I've experienced more and more of the real world, I've grown to like it more and more. Although it's not something everyone necessarily has to like, I prefer life to virtual reality. I'm not going to try to change Dan to make him more like me; he's his own unique person, and it's up to him to go through his unique life path. I'm not going to tell him how to get girls, I'm not going to tell him how to be cooler, how to be more fashionable, or how to do anything of that nature. I'm not going to tell him to go to the gym more often, to be friendlier, or to stop watching anime. Maybe he will achieve all of these things through imitation, but it's none of my business to change these things. I'm going to hang out with Dan more often, and treat him just like any one of my other friends. I plan on hitting him up to go to the mall soon; here's to he and I being friends again.
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